


Lily Evans's Guide to Avoiding James Potter

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-07-29
Updated: 2009-07-29
Packaged: 2019-01-19 15:38:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12413079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: Lily Evans and her friends devise a plan to get James Potter off her back once and for all. However, as we all know...nothing in life ever goes according to plan. LJ One shot.





	Lily Evans's Guide to Avoiding James Potter

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

  


  


Lily Evans’s Guide to Avoiding James Potter

 

            “Potter!” I exclaimed screeching at the top of my lungs.  “Bloody hell! Leave me alone already!”  

            “I can’t Lily I’m head boy and we have to do heads work together,” James Potter, the most annoying person on the face of this earth, reminded me.

            “I really despise Dumbledore for giving you this position right now,” I said sinking into the couch in the Gryffindor Common Room.  Potter just looked at me.  “Stop looking at me.”  I told him.  Potter just rolled his eyes towards the heavens.  Fine if he wants to play that way…

            “Listen Potter, I’m done with my share of the work so I am going to go up to the girl’s dorm.  You can finish the rest of this stuff by yourself I imagine?”  I said in my most polite voice.

            “Evans we are supposed to work as a _team_ ,” Potter told me stressing the word team.  Fine if he wants to play that game…

            “I’m sorry but I’m very tired and well you know…it’s that time of month so I was thinking I just might go and,” I began choosing my words carefully.

            “Ok you know what never mind go to the dorms goodbye!” Potter exclaimed suddenly looking horrified.  I know I should feel guilty  because that was a rather cruel thing to say, I mean honestly it’s not even that time…but still if it means getting rid of James Potter I would do anything.  I didn’t even know how true that would be until I got back to my dorm.

            There awaiting me were my three best friends Taylor Gunther, Emma Rodriguez, and Karen Soldevek.  All three of them were grinning at me like I was some sort of, happy person.  Truth be told, it was rather unnerving.  And now I realize I had every right to be scared.  Especially with what happened next.  

            “Lily we have something very important to tell you,” Karen said still smiling. 

            “Please don’t tell me one of you is pregnant or getting married,” I said worried.  Seriously their smiles were starting to freak me out.

            “We have something that will solve all of your problems,” Taylor told me.  This statement caught my interest.

            “Introducing your new best friend,” Emma announced pulling a piece of folded up parchment out of the pocket of her robes and handing it to me.

            “A piece of parchment is my new best friend?” I asked skeptically.  This was getting weird.   

            “It’s not just any piece of parchment,” Emma told me still grinning, “Go ahead and unfold it.”  Still rather confused I unfolded my new best friend.  There were several lines of writing on it.  Each line looked like it was written by a different person because the handwriting changed so much.  My jaw dropped when I fully comprehended that it was a list, a list entitled: Lily Evans’s Guide to Avoiding James Potter.

            “You can’t be serious,” I told my friends.  As much as I loved them this was rather insane.

            “Just read it,” urged Taylor.  So I did.

** Lily Evans’s Guide to Avoiding James Potter **

  1. **_Every time he starts talking to you turn around and look at him with a face that clearly says “What the hell are you doing?”_**  Where they for real?
  2. **_Every time he asks you out, which is quite often, stand as still as a statue and pretend to not notice him. Perhaps this will discourage the guy, seeing as both rejecting and insulting him did not work.  Maybe a good dose of the cold shoulder is exactly what he needs._** But insulting Potter was so much fun! 
  3. **_Insist that he has cooties and refuse to do your head duties whenever he is around._**   Well now, that is just plain childish.
  4. **_Make a very dramatic showing of dropping your books on the way to class._**   **_Then when he comes to help you pick them up kick him where the sun don’t shine and claim that he was trying to steal your personal belongings._** Karen definitely wrote that one.
  5. **_Hit him nonstop with your hair when he insists on sitting behind you in class, which of course he does every single day._** Guys do seem to really hate that.
  6. **_When he tries to impress you by telling you that he loves you in French, which we all know he does on a regular basis, actually strike up a conversation in the language._** Well, there’s only one problem there.  To do that I would actually need to be able to speak French.
  7. **_Scream in a really obnoxious voice “You’re stepping on my foot!” every time he comes within a five foot radius._**
  8. **_Step on his foot every time he comes within a five foot radius._**   Seriously?!
  9. **_Die your hair brown.  Seriously this will work, Potter loves your red hair._**  Honestly, I know for a fact that Taylor wrote that one, does she really think he is that shallow?  Well, who knows, it’s Potter after all.
  10. **_Tell him that you are a man trapped in a woman’s body and insist that he call you Lyle from now on._**   Only Emma could come up with something like that.



 

 

I looked up at my friends in disbelief.  They were all of course smiling at me expectantly.  They did after all come up with ten ways to get rid of James Potter.

            “Do you guys honestly think this will work?” I asked them warily.

            “Lily, how long have you wanted to get rid of James Potter?” asked Karen.

            “Ever since first year,” I replied without hesitating.

            “How long have you put up with his annoying antics?” Emma questioned me.

            “Ever since first year,” I repeated immediately.

            “And now, we have a way you can get rid of him…so what are you waiting for?!” Taylor exclaimed.

            “So you really think I should go through with this?” I demanded to know.

            “Yes!” chorused all three of my friends.  So I had no other choice.  I was going to get rid of James Potter, and I was going to use this ridiculous guide to boot.  They began to look at me rather expectantly.

            “What you want me to start now?” I asked bewildered.

            “Well duh,” Emma said.  

            “Tomorrow morning,” I decided.  This seemed to please the three of them.  Merlin knows what I just got myself into.

 

 

The next morning I awoke feeling very scared about what I was going to be doing over the next couple of days.  I mean I love my friends and all but some of these things seemed rather insane.  I mean dying my hair brown to get rid of a boy?  Screaming like an idiot when Potter comes near me?   The rest of the school is going to think that the Head Girl has gone clinically insane.  There was no way I was going to go through with this.

Ok, so I am really going to do this.  I have been forced to by the awful people that call themselves my friends.  Ok, so they didn’t really force me into this, they talked me into this but still!  Following this guide is against my better judgment mark my words!

So, number one, the weird look.  I can do that.  I’ve been giving Potter weird looks for just about my entire life.

 

_Number One:_

            I was in the common room along with Taylor and Emma.  We were just sitting in front of the fire when James and Peter came up to us.  

            “Hello Evans,” said James rather politely.  I wonder if he thinks Im still in a mood.  Well, he probably will for the next couple of days anyway.  That’s the point of this after all, drive him out with my pure insanity…I hope to Merlin above this works.  I turned around and glared at Potter.  I gave him my best “What the hell are you doing?!” face.  And you know what?! I think it actually had some sort of affect.  

            Well, it affected Peter anyways.  He turned and ran for his life back up to the seventh year boy’s dorm.  James on the other hand just said, “Good to see you’re feeling better.”  He then sat down on the couch next to Emma.  The three of us girls exchanged horrified looks.  They had told me this would get rid of James Potter!  How could this fail me! 

            Then my common sense kicked in.  Obviously glaring at him wouldn’t scare Potter off.  He had received way too many glares from me to count.  This glare probably looked nice compared to some of the ones I had given him in the past, yes that must be it!

 

_Number Two:_

Well the glare did not work, James was still sitting on the couch but Emma and Taylor had got up and left the two of us alone.  I hate it when people do that.  So I figured I would give method number two a chance if the opportunity presented itself.  

            “So Evans, seeing as you are feeling better than yesterday, do you fancy going to Hogsmeade with me tonight?” Potter asked.  Oh how perfect.

            “Potter there isn’t a Hogsmeade trip tonight!” I said before I could stop myself.  Oh crap, I was supposed to pretend to be a statue when he asked me out.  I had to fix my mistake, “What I mean is,” and then I froze.  I perfected a statue face.  Strong and silent.  I gave him one of the best cold shoulders ever.

            “Evans?” Potter asked looking at me peculiarly.  I suppose it was quite strange of me to stop in mid sentence.  Oh well, what’s done is done.  “Evans hellooo earth to Evans!” Potter decided it would be a good idea to wave his hand in front of my face.  It took all my willpower not to smack his hand away right then and there.  “Oh shit you’ve been cursed haven’t you!” Potter exclaimed leaping to his feat.  He then went and climbed on top of the couch.  Potter pulled out his wand and pointed it at the crowd of Gryffindors.  “Alright which one of you hooligans cursed Lily!?” he demanded to know.  Our fellow housemates just gave Potter a look.  Obviously, none of them had cursed me.

            Potter continued to stand on the couch and shout at the Gryffindors.  It would have been humorous if one of the rather rude third years hadn’t come over and pushed him off the couch.  

            “None of us cursed her ok?! Now shut up!” yelled the little boy.  He was pretty strong for just a third year.  Without thinking I jumped up.

            “Potter are you ok?” I asked pulling him to his feet.

            “Yeah fine,” he answered and then he froze, “Wait a second…you weren’t cursed?” 

            “I give a pretty good impression of a statue,” I told him proudly.  And then Potter did not look very happy.

            “I can’t believe you did that!  You had me so worried that something awful happened to you.”  He exclaimed looking worried.  I couldn’t think of anything to say.  I didn’t mean to actually scare him.  My brain had frozen.  My mind just wasn’t working people so please don’t judge me for the next thing I do.

            “YOU HAVE COOTIES!” I yelled jumping away from him.

            “Bloody hell Evans are you twelve?” Potter exclaimed advancing towards me.

 

_Number Three:_

            Ok so technically I was supposed to refuse to do my heads duties with him but I was improvising here. 

            “STAY AWAY COOTIES MAN!” I screamed at him running to hide behind the couch.  The rest of the common room was now watching us.  I suppose the two of us were giving a good show.  The head girl was currently running away from the head boy in fear of catching the cooties.

            “Lily Evans what is wrong with you?” bellowed Potter jumping over the couch to look at me straight in the eye.

            “GET AWAY!  I’M GOING TO CATCH YOUR INFECTION!” I screeched at the top of my lungs.  And then, I began to run.  Yes run. I ran around the common room…and you know what? Potter chased me.  We were so caught up in our little game of tag that I hadn’t even noticed the conversation between Sirius Black, Potter’s best friend and partner and crime, and my best friend Taylor.

            “So I see you gave her the list?” Sirius asked laughing.

            “Yep,” Taylor told him, “I still don’t see how this is going to help get them together.”

            “When Lily does all this insane stuff she will realize that James puts up with it.  She will eventually realize that James Potter loves her no matter what.”  Sirius told her proudly.

            “If you say so,” Taylor sighed.

            “HELP THE COOTIE MAN IS CHASING ME!  BACK AWAY YOU INFECTED FIEND!”

            “You better be right Sirius Black.  My best friend is currently insisting that Potter has cooties all because of that list of yours.  This better work.”

 

            Looking back on yesterday I realized it could have gone better.  I mean, it wasn’t really necessary for me to cause such a commotion in the common room.  By the end of the day no one would approach Potter because most of them thought he had some sort of highly contagious disease.  I giggled at the thought.  Of course, there was no way James would talk to me now.  I had caused so much mayhem yesterday.  It is so unlike me to be this crazy…it’s actually kind of fun.

 

_Number Four:_

            Taylor, Emma, Karen and I were all walking to class together when Karen leaned over and whispered, “James and his friends are walking behind us today.  It’s time to drop your books.”  I fought the urge to turn around and see if the Gryffindor boys in question really were walking behind us.  I sighed, I didn’t really want to ruin my book bag but I knew the only way four all my books to fall and not have look purposeful was to have the bag split.          Frowning I cast a simple splitting spell on my bag.

            “Oh no!” Taylor yelled dramatically.

            “Lily your bag broke!” exclaimed Emma.  Note to self, never let Taylor or Emma take up a career in acting.

            “You guys go ahead.  I’ll catch up in class I don’t want you to be late because of me,” I told them convincingly.  It’s probably something I would have said if this hadn’t been on purpose anyways.  I watched as my three friends ran ahead of me giggling the entire time.  Shaking my head I placed a repairing charm on my bag.

            “Here let me help,” came a masculine voice.  I looked up to see that it was none other than James Potter.  I stood up with a couple books in my hand.

            “No really that’s ok,” I told him.  Potter however, decided that no meant yes and I wanted help and he began to pick my books up.  When he stood up I promptly kicked him in the shin.  I know I was supposed to kick him in the danger zone but I just couldn’t bring myself to  be that cruel.

            “BLOODY HELL!” he screamed in a highly shrill voice dropping to his knees.  We were starting to attract some stares now.  “What was that for?!” he demanded to know.

            “You think you can get away with stealing my books!” I accused him angrily.  I was pretty good at this pretending to be insulted thing.  Note to self, consider a career in acting if I don’t pass the NEWTS.  Oh the horror if I didn’t pass my NEWTS I would explode.  Erase that note.

            “Merlin Lily that hurt!” he moaned still on his knees, “I was only trying to help.  I wasn’t stealing your books.” 

            “THEIF!” I shouted, “Liar!” James just looked at me as if I were crazy, and well, these days I was.  I had nothing else to add so I took off running so I could make it to Charms without being late.

            “How’d it go?” asked Emma as I slid into my seat next to her.  

            “Pretty good.  He seemed pretty peeved maybe he’ll leave me alone for good!” I responded smiling.  Unfortunately, I was wrong.  Potter slid into the seat right behind me seconds before the bell rang signaling the start of charms.

 

_Number Five:_

            I took out a piece of parchment and scribbled a fast note to Emma.  I was amazed that Potter still wanted to sit within a few feet of me after I probably injured him significantly.  Emma decided it was time for step number five.  I leaned back in my chair.  Let me tell you, that is something I never do.  It is bad for your posture.  Anyways, I knew Potter always sat forwards in his seat so if I leaned back slightly and turned my head I could whip him with my hair.  One problem though, it was down, and not about to cause harm.

            “Evans your hair smells lovely but could you please get it out of my face?” Potter whispered into my ear when Flitwick was turned away from the class and writing on the blackboard.  I moved up slightly in my seat.  I then, flipped my hair down and placed it into a pony tail.  Perfect, I could really hit him with it now.  I leaned back into my chair again and turned my head sharply.  I heard a muffled “Ow” and was satisfied for the moment.

            Five minutes later I did the same thing.  Potter sneezed this time.  Thankfully he had manners enough to sneeze to his side and not in my hair.  Unfortunately, this meant he showered Remus Lupin with his snot.  

            “Gross!” hissed Remus glaring at his friend. 

            “Sorry mate!” Potter apologized.

            “Boys is there something you would like to share with the class?” commented Professor Flitwick.

            “No Professor,” they mumbled.  I leaned back again and whipped my head around as fast as I could. 

            “Oh come on,” groaned Potter.  “Lily your hair is beautiful, really it is, but please stop hitting me with it.”  I hit him again.  This charade continued through out the class.  I was pleased to see that in Defense Against the Dark Arts next period Potter sat far away from me.

 

_Numbers Six, Seven, and Eight:_

            If I thought I was done with Potter I was very wrong.  He came up to me and told me that he was sorry for yelling at me for hitting him with my hair.  I just stared at him like he was a ghost or something.  I mean really, come on!  What does it take to get rid of this guy!?  I was following the guide every step of the way and nothing was working.

            “Seriously?!” I exclaimed not being able to think of something more intelligent.

            “Je t'aime!” Potter told me as he usually did.  Except this time I had a plan.  The night before I had looked up some things in French.  I was so ready for him.  He wouldn’t know what hit him.

            “Tais-toi, idiot!”I yelled at him in the foreign language.  Naturally we were in the common room.  So naturally, the head boy and head girl were getting quite a few odd looks.  It’s not every day you hear someone yelling insanely in another language.

            “Tu crois vraiment que ca c'est ce que je suis?” Potter returned.  I stared at him at a complete loss for words.  I had not expected him to actually know the language.  All I know is that I told him “Shut up, idiot!” and it took me awhile to memorize that.  Now Potter was answering me, in French nonetheless.  I had no idea he was actually fluent in the language.  

            I was at a complete loss.  I had no idea what to do.  There was nothing in the guide about what to do if he actually knew French.  Merlin knows what he had just said to me.  I Lily Evans, was panicking and as much as I hate to admit it, when I panic, I tend to get a little crazy.  I tend to do things I wouldn’t normally do under a large amount of pressure.

            “You’re stepping on my foot!” I yelled at him angrily.

            “Lily what are you going on about?” James asked me rather confused.  First he looked down to see that he was definitely not stepping on my foot and then he looked back at me.  When James looked back up I seized the chance and stomped on his foot and then ran away.

            “Oh for the love of Merlin!” James cried grabbing his injured foot in his hands and he then proceeded to hop after me.  

            “Two feet are better than one!” I cried out pointlessly.  There was no way he could catch me if he was hopping around.  And with that announcement of nonsense I went back to the girl’s dorm.

            When I got back to the safety of the girl’s dorm I took a moment to think about what had just happened.  For the first time during the past week I began to feel bad about what I was doing to James.  Heck, I’ve even started calling him James in my mind!  I knew all the insane things I was doing had to be hurting him.

            Today I even physically harmed him!  I used to play soccer in Muggle School so I knew when I kicked him that it had to hurt.  It isn’t exactly a walk in the park to have someone stomp on your foot either.  Maybe he didn’t deserve all this torture I was putting him through.

            I was just about to flop back onto my bed when my wand fell out of my pocket.  At that exact moment a rat scurried across the floor and picked up my wand with its teeth.  I looked at the rat in complete disbelief.  Was this really happening? 

            “Stupid rat!” I yelled and I began to chase the rat around the dorm.  I must have been making a lot of noise because seconds later Karen came running up.

            “What is going on in here?!  All we can hear is screaming and stomping!” she exclaimed obviously worried.

            “NOOOOOOOOOOOO!” I moaned.  The rat had escaped through the door Karen had just opened.

            “What?” asked Karen obviously not seeing the little rodent.

            “That rat just ran away with my wand!” I explained angrily.

            “Oooh k,” Karen said obviously thinking I had gone crazy.  “Why don’t you just worry about step number nine ok?”

            “No! I need to find that rat!” I told her.  With that I jumped up and ran out the door.  “I’ll get you! STUPID RAT!” 

            “Wha-OW!”  I had ran head on into a person promptly after running down the stairs.

            “So I’m a rat now?” James asked his tone rather severe.

            “No not you.  A rat took my wand,” I told him, “And I need to find it right now.”

            “That’s a likely story but first you and I are having a talk Lily Evans,” James instructed.

            “But my wand…”  However, James would hear no more until we had our talk.  I sighed and allowed myself to be led over to the couches in front of the fireplace.

            “What has gotten into you lately?” James asked getting straight to the point.

            “What do you mean?” I asked playing innocent.

            “You have turned into a crazy person Lily.  Just the other day you accused me of having cooties.”  I blushed to the tips of my red hair remembering that.  “And every five seconds you are either yelling at me or kicking me in very painful places that are meant to be treated with gentle love and care.”   I rolled my eyes.  “Im serious Lily!  What is happening to you?!”  I began to feel very guilty.  After all, I was really putting this guy though a lot.  “You are the head girl and it’s high time you start acting like it!”  Suddenly all my guilt that I had previously felt vanished into thin air.  James Potter prankster extraordinaire was telling me that I had to be more responsible!? Oh boy I was so finishing the last two steps in the guide.  I was going to get rid of James Potter if it’s the last thing I did!

            “Goodbye Potter!” I called out rudely and leapt to my feet.  “I have a wand to find!”  James just stared at me looking very confused.  I then began to search the common room for any signs of the rat that had so rudely stolen my wand.  It wasn’t until later in the evening that I realized I was never going to find my wand without some help.  Oddly enough, none of my friends seemed to be around at the time.  However, I did see someone else in the common room.

 

_Numbers Nine and Ten:_

            “Black!” I said approaching Sirius.

            “Hello Evans! If you’ve come to torture James today he’s not here,” Sirius replied.

            “No I’m not here to torture James.  I actually need your help.  You see, this rat stole my wand and I can’t find it,” I explained the rodent situation.

            “Oh so you want my help finding your wand,” Sirius said.

            “Well yes.”  I had thought that would have been quite obvious.

            “Do you need it right away?” asked Sirius.

            “Well I was sort of hoping to do a spell by tonight,” I admitted after all, I was becoming rather distressed.

            “What spell?” asked Sirius curiously.

            “I want to turn my hair brown,” I confessed.

            “Oh I can do that!” Sirius said swishing his wand and muttering something.  “Take a look!” he told me pulling out a mirror.  

            “Wow, that was fast,” I said admiring my new chocolate brown locks. 

            “I’m just that good!” Sirius told me and then he left.

            “Hey wait what about my wand!” I shouted at his retreating back.  However, the boy did not turn around.  I sighed and flung myself face down onto the couch.  I found myself taking a short nap.  My peace was short lived though.  My wonderful nap was interrupted.

            “Excuse me miss do you mind if I sit here?” asked a very polite voice.  It took me awhile to realize that the voice belonged to James.

            “My name is miss now?  I’m that crazy that you won’t even call me by my real name?” I asked picking my head up to look James in the eye.  James yelled and jumped back in surprise.

            “What happened to your hair?” he asked in amazement.

            “I changed the color,” I said twirling a strand of hair absent mindedly.

            “But why?” James asked still looking rather amazed.

            “Because I felt like it,” I informed him rather smugly.

            “The red is gone,” James stated.

            “Yes well spotted.”

            “Your hair isn’t red anymore.”

            “We have clarified that yes.”     

            “You have brown hair now.”

            “It’s nice to see you know your colors.”

            “The red is gone.”

            “This could go on all day!” I yelled impatiently.

            “But why?” James asked looking bewildered.  I took a moment to admire how cute he looked when he was confused.  I then mentally smacked myself for being stupid. James Potter is not cute.  It hit me that I didn’t have a reason for my change of heart in my hair color other than the fact that I was trying to make him stop liking me.  However, I couldn’t exactly tell that to his face.

            “Because I’m a man trapped in a woman’s body!” I yelled.  My mouth didn’t bother to wait for my mind to think up a better excuse.  I silently cursed that list.  How could I have said something so stupid?

            “Lily are you feeling ok?” James asked me looking rather worried.

            “Lily? I don’t know any Lily…unless you’re counting the flowers.  My name is Lyle,” I said against my better judgment.

            “Lily Evans stop this insanity!” James exclaimed throwing his arms up into the air.

            “Lily Evans is a figment of your imagination James.  I am Lyle Evans, honestly,” I kept my horrific charade going.

            “You’re out of your mind,” James said shaking his head.

            “No you are,” I retorted childishly, “I am Lyle Evans…somehow I got stuck in a girl’s body.  What don’t you understand about that!”

            “Ok fine Lily if you don’t want to talk to me you can just say so.  You don’t have to pretend you’re a guy.  I was just trying to be nice and you have been acting like a crazy person all week.  I can take a hint,” James spieled looking rather hurt.  With that he turned around and left.  I glared defiantly at his retreating back.  Damn James Potter and his ability to make me incredibly angry.  It appears thought that the guide has worked.  I sighed as I began walking back to my dorm.

            “Hey you!” said Karen when I walked in.

            “’lo” I replied dully.

            “I see you attempted step number nine,” Emma said taking notice of my now brown hair.

            “And ten,” I told my friends as I sat down on my bed.

            “And?” asked Taylor expectantly.

            “Well it worked,” I said not feeling as happy or elated as I should have.  I was too busy being in a bad mood to notice that my friends were exchanging worried glances.

            “It worked!?” exclaimed Taylor.  If I wasn’t feeling so bad for myself I would have noticed the hint of surprise in her voice.

            “Yep.  It’s all fine and dandy James is done with me.  Yay,” I said forcing a smile onto my face.

            “Lily that was the worst Yay in the history of ever,” Emma observed. 

            “I just feel a little guilty is all,” I tried explaining my feelings.

            “Why?” asked Karen.

            “I really went insane.  I treated James like crap,” I told them looking at the floor.

            “James?” echoed Emma.

            “Yes James, that is his name after all,” I said confused.

            “I know but usually you call him Potter or Bighead or Inconsiderate Prick or…”  Emma started naming every cruel name I had ever come up with for James.

            “Ok I get the point,” I interrupted her.

            “So James is done with you.  That’s good right?” Karen said trying to get whatever I was keeping inside of me out.            

            “Yeah sure,” I said.  “I have to go I need to find my wand.”

            “Lils why don’t we just do a summoning charm?” offered Taylor.  I pretended not to hear her as I shut the door on my way out.  I went back to the common room and thanked Merlin it was empty.  I really just needed some peace and quiet.  I honestly had no idea why I felt all down in the dumps.

            For as long as I’ve known James Potter I’ve hated his guts.  He’s always been this annoying arrogant prat to me.  At the beginning of this week I was all for getting rid of him once and for all but now I just feel so horrible about the whole thing.  I sighed throwing myself down onto the couch.  A piece of my hair flew into my eye rather painfully.  I was then reminded of how brown it was now and the fact that I can’t find my wand and suddenly I burst into tears.

            With my eyes watering like crazy and sobs wracking my body I flopped face down into the pillows of the maroon couch.  I was becoming such an awful wreck.  It was so unlike me to just cry.  I’ve always been quite good at handling stress. I was too busy drowning in self pity to hear James enter the common room.

            “Hello!?” he called out.  I immediately hushed up my crying.  “Whoever’s in there are you alright?”  I decided it would be best not to answer.  I didn’t trust myself to be able to keep my voice from trembling.  “Lily? Or should I say Lyle?”

            “Go away!” I said in a strangled whisper.  I frowned at my inability to keep my voice steady.

            “What’s wrong?” he asked hearing my strained voice.  “Were you crying?”

            “Well put captain obvious,” I said furiously trying to dry my eyes.  James came over to the couch where I had sat up.

            “Why were you crying?” he persisted.

            “It’s nothing really,” I said wishing he would just go away.  

            “Obviously it is if you cried about it,” James reasoned.  

            “I can’t find my wand,” I told him, “a rat stole it.”

            “A rat?” James repeated my words.

            “Yes a rat,” I said still frowning. 

            “Wait right here,” James instructed me he then sprinted up the stairs to the boys dorms.  For some reason, I listened to him.  James returned shortly after with my wand in his hand.  “Peter has a rather adventurous pet rat,” James explained handing me my wand.

            “Thanks,” I muttered taking my wand from him and staring at it.  I couldn’t for the life of me figure out how to change my hair back to its original color.  My lower lip trembled as I fought against the tears that threatened to come.  

            “Is something else wrong?” James asked.

            “My hair is brown,” I told him still looking at my wand.

            “Yes, well spotted, as you so eloquently told me before,” James stated my previous words.

            “I can’t make it go back,” I mumbled feeling quite stupid.

            “I can if you want me too,” James told me smiling.  I looked up at him and nodded.  He swished his wand like Sirius had done earlier and I knew my hair had changed back. 

            “Why are you being so nice?” I asked him feeling very confused.  Earlier that day he basically declared he was through with me.

            “Because,” James said.

            “That’s just the kind of person you are,” I said suddenly feeling a fresh wave of guilt.  Why it had taken me so long to realize I don’t know.  But right now it was as clear as day.  I had been wrong about James all along.  There really was a good side to him I just never gave him the chance to show me.

            “I-what?” James asked shocked at my words.

            “I’m sorry for being such a crazy person this week.  I’m sorry that you wasted all your time on me,” and with that I got up and made to leave.

            “What do you mean wasting my time?” James asked.

            “To be honest.  My friends came up with some clever ways to try and get you off my back.  I decided to use them.  That’s why I have been so crazy and cruel all week.  I’m sorry you didn’t deserve that,” I confessed feeling the guilt lift off my shoulders.  The truth was out now.  I could breathe at last.

            “You’ve been trying to get rid of me?” James asked looking truly hurt.

            “I’m sorry,” I said and I ran back up to my room.  As I blew past my friends they all shouted but I ignored them and threw my bed hangings closed.  They knew enough to leave me alone.  I couldn’t believe what an idiot I had been.  Oh well, what’s done is done.  I pulled the guide out of my pocket and tore it to shreds while muttering about the stupidity of lists and boys.  

 

 

            Taylor, Emma, Karen, Remus, and Sirius were very confused the next couple of days.  James was currently ignoring me.  If he looked at me it was only with disdain.  I was of course acting the complete opposite of the previous week.  Sirius decided to have a chat with Taylor unknown to me or anyone else at the time.

 

            “BLACK! You’re stupid guide didn’t work!” she yelled!

            “Well Evans wasn’t supposed to start feeling guilty!” Sirius defended himself.

            “Yeah and neither of them was supposed to get hurt but they did,” Taylor sighed.

            “This is all our fault,” Sirius declared.

            “You think?” asked Taylor sarcastically.

            “I’m just going to tell James the truth,” Sirius said running a hand through his hair.

            “I would tell Lily but I think it would only depress her even more.  Besides what’s telling them the truth going to do.  It’s not going to change the fact that they still got hurt” Taylor reasoned with the boy.  But then Sirius silenced her.

            “I have an idea.”

 

 

 

            The next day Taylor came and sought me out in the library.  I was trying to work on a very hard piece of homework to no avail.  

            “Hey Lily I know you’re feeling horrible about the guide.  We all are.  But me, Emma, and Taylor are all writing notes to James explaining the situation and how we _feel_ about him and everything.  We aren’t going to mail them just shred them like you did the guide.  It might be a good idea if you wrote one too,” she said telling me exactly what Sirius had told her to say.

            “Alright,  but I’m not keeping it you take it and shred it I’ve got too much going on right now I don’t have the time,” I said.

            “Excellent,” replied Taylor handing me a quill and parchment.  

            “Right now?” I asked taking it.

            “We don’t have all day silly,” Taylor told me.  So I wrote.

 

_Dear James,_

_I’m sorry.  I can’t say it enough I really am sorry for what I did to you.  It wasn’t right.  I was just so set on the fact that you were annoying that I couldn’t comprehend the idea that there might be another side to you.  I now see that I was mistaken.  You are a good person it just took me too long to realize that.  So once again, I’m sorry.  I’m sorry for being an inconsiderate prick.  I’m sorry for kicking you and stepping on your feet.  I’m sorry for making everyone think you had a highly contagious disease.  I’m sorry for hitting you in the face with my hair every five seconds.  I’m sorry for ignoring you.  I’m sorry for trying to get rid of you.  I’m sorry that by doing all this I got rid of the chance to get to know the real you.  I’m sorry for destroying any chance that we had of ever getting together._

_Love,_

_Lily (Lyle) Evans_

In fact, writing that letter gave me a great feeling of closure.  It felt rather nice in fact.  I handed Taylor me letter and went on completing my ancient runes translations.  I went back to the common room feeling rather good about myself.  

“Lily!” yelled a voice somewhere to my left.  My eyes scanned the room.  It was empty save for some third years and a group of fifth years.  I then noticed James waving his hand and apparently yelling my name.  But why would he even bother talking to me anymore?  It just didn’t make any sense.

“James?” I asked rather confused as I walked over to him.

“It’s ok.  It doesn’t matter that you tried to get rid of me.  In fact, I don’t care.  Because you know what? It didn’t work.  Not one bit.  Yeah it hurt a lot but after reading your letter,” James began.

“What letter?” I asked confused.  James pulled out the letter I had written for Taylor.  OH THAT EVIL CONNIVING…good friend.  I realized that the apology had maybe fixed my problems.

“Oh right,” I said smiling, “I meant what I said.”

“I know,” said James grinning from ear to ear. 

“So…um, are we still cool?” I asked lamely.  Are we still cool?  What on earth was I thinking.  Could I be any more of a dork?

“Yeah we’re cool.  But only if you promise to come with me to Hogsmeade tonight,” James agreed smirking.

“James there isn’t a trip tonight,” I told him skeptically.

“Oh I know.  But there are a lot of things you don’t know about me and it’s high time you found out.”  And on that note I left the common room hand in hand with James Potter.  Of course, we were crouching down hiding under his invisibility cloak but what can you expect?  Its James we’re talking about here.  And as I now know there is a lot more to him than meets the eye.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks to annna from fanfiction.net for the French translation.  I really appreciate it!

 

''tu crois vraiment que ca c'est ce que je suis?  That’s what you really think I am? 

 


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